Top 20 weird sentences

Being a word nerd, I love listening to different people with different dialects (one step up from an accent, but one below a language). Things like area specific slang and the way people construct their sentences has always amused me. Never has the latter been more obvious than when I started attending my lectures and discovered that all university lecturers are barmy! There must be a rule somewhere that you must be a certain degree of nuts before being able to teach. And so, to keep myself amused during some of the more tedious of lectures I’ve started keep note of what they say. It is my pleasure to share some of the top 20 more amusing ones with you.

  1. “You can return to your bread debate later”
  2. “There was a bit of a bun fight about teacakes”
  3. “Probably NOT ok to laugh at people ’cause they’re fat”
  4. “I’m a recent convert to the wonders of Blackpool”
  5. “If you’re a sufficiently elevated level of poshness…”
  6. “Five people think it’s a sentence, nobody else gives a shit”
  7. “There is no reason why a hairy, four-legged, barking thing should be referred to as a ‘dog'”
  8. “I’m trying to strike the right level of rant-y-ness with what I’m about to say”
  9. “Anticipation. Shitload of syllables in this one!”
  10. “I attack, I don’t know, a lollipop or something”
  11. “So… Lungs are pretty important for speaking”
  12. “But Shakespear can pretty much do what he wants anyway so…”
  13. “‘Cat’ is just a category of thing”
  14. “I love colons. The grammatical ones.”
  15. “We have a kicker and something that needs to be kicked”
  16. “And I was thinking ‘I’m just the interpreter! You deal with it.'”
  17. “Oh, I feel like doing a little dance of excitement!”
  18. “Why does ‘cat’ mean this little furry thing?”
  19. “But if you grab a child and open their mouth…”
  20. “God, Beth, I’m falling in love with you and your dialect!”

What have we learnt today? I learnt some of my lecturers don’t like animals or thinking through sentences before they speak. The quotes were just as odd in context as they are without.


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